When I'm Stuck or Paused & Fretting that I'm not "Progressing"... & Shifting to See the Beauty in the Ebb

Sunday was a day of snow globe beauty, without the snow. It was one of those magically hyper blue-sky, crisp air, warm sun, blooming spring days where I could feel the happy glow in all my brief encounters with people that day. It was a technicolor dream of a day.

And yet, every cell in my being magnetized me to stay indoors with my pup, snuggle in quiet, listening to him snuffle in his nap dreams. 

I had lots of productive ambitions for that day. I had mapped it out as a day to make progress on a key piece for my website that I wanted to share with portrait photography clients. I was looking forward to the creation time.

Nothing got done that day on my list. 

I berated myself for a bit on procrastinating. And then I surrendered to this undeniable need to be still. 

I declared it a COZY day. 

I knew that my body knew what it was doing. My brain was resisting a bit. But I let go of the tizzy my thoughts spun in and said to them, "I need this. And I trust it, the stillness. It feeds me. So pipe down with your doubts." 

The leisure of unstructured space. It's magic for the soul and creative energies. That's where deep shifts occur. That's where puzzle pieces fall into place. On levels that may not be conscious at the time, but that rise to the surface days later. 

Progress doesn't need to look busy to be progress. 

Deep knowing, deep truth aligning, source-level truing up, towards our life dreams, towards our next steps, towards our matching our being to our actions... this kind of alchemy transpires often without seeing its ripple on our pond's surface. But then it can burst forth into the sun as we feel that renewed well of energy move us into action. 

As much as I know this pattern about my process and myself, I can doubt it when I'm in it. I wanted to share it with you, in case you, too, experience a similar pattern and doubt. The stillness is often my wisest time. My wisest space. When I honor it, I am so grateful I listened to the quiet. Rebirth is not sustainable as a constant tempo. Like the seasons and waves on the ocean, we ebb and flow. 

Grateful for that ebb.

I revisit this video when I'm in ebb times. I hope you find inspiration in it too.

Multi-Tasking Into Multi-A$$-King? Press Pause, Our Trusty Replenisher

This weekend I was excited to hunker down with photography. I was keen to process images from a shoot, I wanted to put together a marketing video, I was excited to paint a backdrop, & I had concocted various juicy ideas to play with. 

I launched Saturday morning with gusto, painting the backdrop after breakfast. And then... the fire in my engines sputtered. My mojo had been waning Friday, & I took the afternoon off thinking that would restore my verve. But when the simplest weekend photo share on Instagram felt arduous, I knew stronger measures were needed. 

Do you feel this way from time to time?

Even when we have plans on deck we are motivated to do, we can find ourselves circling in a lackluster limbo. Crabbiness can show its unsavory self here, too. 

My early alert signal for an impending pause is my thought tone. When I'm in a good rhythm, rested + energized, my thoughts are "CAN DO" & "I BELIEVE I CAN." When they start to sour towards seeing even the most basic efforts like doing the dishes as burdensome, I'm due for a replenish. Actions & energies follow thoughts. Our mind has amazing power to set our body in motion. Or not. When it feels like a struggle to get to a flow state, REST.

Our bodies will find a way to bring us to a FULL STOP when we don't honor the need for a replenishing pause. Sickness often hits us when we are depleted, when we have been too busy to sleep & get our nutrients, including our soul nutrients of quiet + space. We can also start to make mistakes, choices we would not have made if we were in full flow, start banging into walls & dropping things.


Why is a Full Pause beneficial?

I liken it to a defragmentation of our internal motherboard. Our brain has been juggling so many projects, decisions, tasks, imaginings, prioritizing, etc. that it gets clogged & grumpy. It needs to be snuggled & given free time to look out the window, wonder, snooze, listen to birds singing, doodle, get lost in a book or movie, eat brownies, or all of the above. 


FULL PAUSE means take all non-essential items (only BREATHING is truly essential) off the calendar until you feel your vitality flowing again. Not even catching up on friends/family email correspondence is part of the pause. See above for qualifying activities. 

If you find yourself sneaking peeks at your calendar or your chore list, BOOK YOURSELF OFF GRID. Draw a giant smiley face on your day planner & write IN-DAY in bold magic marker. This is our day to LISTEN IN to what our intuitive selves know we need. On your digital calendar, block the whole day as unavailable [I like to note it as being on a retreat with myself] & walk away from it. Done. On to the most important part, the actual PAUSE.

What does FULL PAUSE look like?

Quite often, full pause for me means no errands but instead staying in or only going out on walkabouts with Ernie or my morning runs. Early to bed. Reading a mystery novel. Slowing the tempo & focusing fully on one thing. Wiggling my toes can take all my attention in a full pause. At its essence, it is appreciating the luxury of time without schedule. 

Usually, my full pause begins to work its magic in a day or day+half. I know I am replenished when I look forward to blitzing through little things on my list. Or taking on one biggie to-do with zest.

Getting back in rhythm

We can become so oriented on achieving that we forget our natural rhythms rise & fall throughout each day, during the month, seasonally. Forcing those rhythms to be up when they are down, instead of surfing them, can bring on icky negative energies & self-destructive talk. 

When we give ourselves the REST & RESPITE we need, we bounce back with renewed enthusiasm & creativity. We must be courageous in pressing pause, knowing it is the best path forward. 

What is your alert that it's time to press pause? What are your favorite replenishing routines when you pause?

Please share your thoughts/inspirations below as we continue to explore how to live with our Inner Lights shining fully. We are a band of creatives with lifetimes of support, wit & wisdom. Welcome to our Inner Light Tribe! Enter your email on the blog page to stay connected. 

Join Me for an Inner Light Portrait experience An invitation to play, to express & create portraits capturing your rarity, setting you apart from the crowd + showcasing your Inner YES! 



Being Kind When We Feel Unkind

I met the most beautiful soul this weekend. She lives wide open.

  • Curious about the world and eager to explore, she does not shrink from new-ness.
  • She welcomes ALL others she encounters, no matter their age, appearance or mood. I watched her meet total strangers, including me, with a warmth and optimism and love that was infectious.
  • Even when things didn't go as she would have wished, like hearing "No" or being redirected from her focus, she shook it off and returned with an exuberance that inspired us all to be in her energy.

Her positivity is even more impressive given her background of being abused and deprived of basic necessities like nutrition, medical care and love. She may well remember her not too-distant horrifying life, but she lives fully in right now & with an optimism about people that I find awe-inspiring.  

Everyone was magnetized to her light & energy. And we all recalibrated our vibrations to hers.

Despite her nightmarish history, she shared nothing but love. 

Her name is Petunia. She is a furry four-legged pup. 


Petunia got me thinking about Kindness.

I think of kindness most often as something I share with others. Or not.

While others appreciate it, kindness is first an act we practice internally. 

I watched Petunia charm with her openness & love. She's an equal-opportunity love bug. She eased nerves, she deflected irritation, she charged us up with laughter. She changed the chemistry of the room with her energy. 

Kindness is transformative.

But how do we practice self-kindness, particularly when we don't feel like it? When frustration or anger burbles & seeps out, it may well be understandable, but it almost never makes me feel better. Anger shifts my own energy to an inner toxicity. I feel sick in my own skin. That ICK dominoes into resentment & shutting down to possibilities for seeing a person or situation differently.

After eons of grappling with how to dispel the inner poison when my anger trigger kicked into gear, I hit upon this solution: SHIFT GEARS. The spiral of anger only takes us deeper if we feed it. We have to remove ourselves from it. Since I'm looking first at practicing kindness towards myself before I can hope to share it with others, shifting gears means stop what I'm doing + do something else. If I'm in a bad space or energy, walk away. Go to another room, go outside. Changing the scene, changes our energy. Best if I can get outdoors & into nature and move. Movement is healing. Thinking how to shift through anger, that's one approach, but thoughts got me there & thoughts can fuel that fire. Movement, letting my body take over rather than my brain, it's like pushing reset on my internal thermostat

Only when I can cease the internal monologue of vexation can I open my eyes to see the light in my own soul. Only when I create space from me & the thoughts/situation that triggered my reaction can I see that this is all only temporary, that in a matter of minutes the hormonal rush will have subsided, and other possibilities exist. 

After kindness towards myself, then there is kindness to others.

My cousin and his wife reminded me recently that my mom told them on their wedding day, "Be kind to one another." This was her advice distilled from decades of living it. 

This is a lifetime practice. Certainly it may seem easier when you LOVE someone. But when you aren't feeling you LIKE them, it might be more challenging to be inclined to practice kindness. At those times, I remember this: Shift Gears. Get back to my internal soul-connection, which lets me reset my inner gremlins and see a bigger picture. We each are in this life doing the best we know how to do. In that opening, I can feel my way to my next step.

How do you get back to a place of practicing kindness when you don't feel like it?

Join us as we continue to explore how to live with our Inner Lights shining fully. We are a band of creatives with lifetimes of support, wit & wisdom. Welcome to our Inner Light Tribe! Enter your email on the blog page to stay connected. 

Join Me for an Inner Light Portrait experience An invitation to play, to express & create portraits capturing your rarity, setting you apart from the crowd + showcasing your Inner YES! 

Celebrating the Beauty of our Ordinary Life

A holiday treat. In the midst of packed schedules & rushing, a reminder that what is most full of love & fulfilling is already with & inside us. In our everyday & in our "ordinary" moments & lives. 

I am most grateful for sharing laughs & vulnerabilities with my family & friends, sharing time together without agenda, holding paws with my pup & feeling grateful that especially when I may feel lost in how I might bring my dreams closer to reality, I am loved & I am not alone. 

I am forever thankful for all who share their stories, fears, personal triumphs & daring, creations, creating, & juicy YESes. Wishing a WONDER-FULL holiday season, rich & glowing from our lights within.