Dimensions of Silence.
That phrase electrifies me. I have been looking, feeling, seeking, traveling, resting into a space I know as home.
You may be on this path, too.
The new year is shifting my landscape. Rather, I am. What I have known, relied upon, and appreciated as support for years is changing.
I requested this shift. And it awakens the terror talk in my gremlin mind. All variations a chorus of: What if I am not [WHATEVER] enough to make this transition successfully?
The unknown is a mystery. Spreadsheets, ouija boards, mediums, I don’t hear my truth from these. I may not know what is coming. But I know my truth.
Authenticity is my way. Integrity. It’s your way. Our way. In stripping away all that is NOT our truth, we SEE ourselves. The voice that may have been quiet. The fractured bits that speak to our wholeness. Our KNOWING. In our truth, we know our calling, our MUST, our YES, our NOW.
I don’t know the rest of my life. But I know this moment I am standing fully in my being.
Wholeness. A beingness I am coming to know again.
I trust the knowing that comes in stillness.
I had lost my stillness. I had lost me. Easy to do in the cacophony of our time, our culture that applauds hustle + frenzy.
I went looking for it on other continents. I caught glimpses.
But I didn’t begin to be re-introduced to myself until I commenced my photographic series Fracturing Into Oneness. I thrashed in resistance aplenty as I visually journeyed into where I was hiding.
And then, I noticed I was no longer looking away. From me. Emerging.
It continues to be a life-shifter for me. Thankfully, my camera is my co-explorer into my unknowns.
As a portrait photographer, I offer that same invitation. In creating a space where the you who might be hiding can show up, you, too, see your authenticity, feel your truth, your stillness. And with that touchstone, your knowing.
Here’s the magic.
On my pre-dawn run yesterday, I was listening to Martha Beck speak about integrity and how we hear our truth when we find our silence within us. She uttered the phrase Dimensions of Silence. I was captivated by what that could be. I had never considered silence to have dimensions. I imagined it to be like the night sky in winter, velvety inky dark with greys and pinks echoing from the horizon, and lapis undertones behind the midnight. I was in a reverie.
And my iPod promptly quit.
WHAT? I may have exclaimed this out loud.
But immediately I went to WOW. OK. Here’s silence.
Then my iPod screen flashed this message: Connect to Power.
I grinned. Taking it as a metaphoric message from the universe. I trotted off toward home on the trail.
An amazingly splendorous tree with three trunks down an incline to my left called my attention. I veered off the path toward the tree. The tree and I hugged. My arms stretching around maybe half its circumference. But fully embracing … and I listened. To my breathing still, my heart settle, the birds chatting, the breeze… looking up through the branches to the starlight, the bark seemed as if a river, flowing. Coursing through me, an energy, a peace. No gremlin mind talk.
Power: the gift of being awake to the magic in this moment. Not spinning on the future unknowns.
Connect to Power. Thank you, iPod.
Thank you to change. To mysteries. To truth. To being our truth.
Thank you to you, for sharing your truths, your lights.
In stillness + silence, vitality.
Cheers to becoming.