With a jolt, I am reminded of the fragility of life.
My friend’s husband unexpectedly left this world way too young.
Epically tragic. Beyond words, the loss, the grief.
My thoughts brewing in recent days keen more sharply with her news. Specifically, this question: How am I engaged in this moment?
For how I live this moment, is how I live my life. Each day we awaken is a miracle. Do we live as if our living is miraculous or are we lulled into taking it for granted?
I’ll paint a quick sketch of my inner aha this week that brought this to life for me … perhaps you, too, see yourself here.
I am 49 & have been walking around as if I am 50 already, inwardly kvetching about this & that bodily change. But also in a bit of denial because numbers generally don’t mean much to me, but this one packs a kapow.
So a fog of gremlin-chatter about this year’s birthday milestone has drawn me into my head-space, out of my moment-to-moment life, robbing me from fully moving + grooving in the world.
Agelessness is our state when we live fully engaged. Living vitally. Appreciating ALIVEness in our moments. Noticing the unnoticed.
As a kid I was fully immersed.
- playing in the woods pretending to be a spy
- confiding in my dog, my partner in all adventures
- reading my Nancy Drews
- drawing with every color in my Crayola box of 64 (with built-in sharpener) and FILLING the pages
- building dioramas of Indian villages
I would forget what time it was. Days would blend into dusk as my world EXPANDED!!
That is the key—I was openly expanding my world & was open to expanding—without that even being a choice.
Somewhere, expansion became constriction.
When did I stop expanding or living so fully engrossed in curiosity + discovering?
When my days became tasks. When schedules turned into masters.
But even within that construct, I have this choice: Where am I engaged in this moment?
- Finding my preferred airport lot full, is parking in the far economy lot a PAIN or an ADVENTURE?
- On the train to my gate am I BRACING to not lurch as the train slows, or am I SURFING the rails?
- As I go through security and encounter a disgruntled TSA screener, am I feeding his DISCONNECTION by mirroring back sourness, or do I breathe and send him a smile CONNECTION, mentally wishing him peace in his day?
This is my alivening. Today. A random day in my ageless living.
I promise my life (with every cell and corpuscle in my body + mind + soul) that I am refreshing my ALIVENESS, AWAKE-itude, AWARE-ity. Being fully engaged as I dive in to appreciate awe in this mystery of unknowns, this experience of unexpecteds, this beautiful swim I feel when I remember we have this one choice:
Am I RESISTING my life or am I ENGAGING in it with awe/wonder?
One shift. It can take us from experiencing our days as mundane or miraculous.
Where might it take us? Oh, how lucky we are to see!
I invite your thoughts/inspirations below as we continue to explore how to live with our Inner Lights shining fully. We are a band of creatives with lifetimes of support, wit & wisdom. Welcome to our Inner Light Tribe! Enter your email on the blog page to stay connected.
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